This is the first in a series of columns in which I discuss simple words that we need to use either more often, because they will make us smarter, or less often, because they get us in too much trouble. These have come about because of my many years in listening to students (as well as morons on television who don’t have the excuse of youth) discuss complicated issues and either make errors in logic or simply struggle to communicate effectively.
This edition: the word “maybe.”
We live in world of definitive claims. Hollywood is racist. We should build a wall. College should be free. Republicans/Democrats/Muslims/Christians/Redheads are evil. Eating polar bear meat will give you powers of invisibility. We’ve heard them all before. Bold statements today grab people’s attention faster than a celebrity’s leaked cell phone photo. But far too often, these positions are as shaky as a Jenga game in a pre-school classroom.
So should we never make absolute statements? Not necessarily. But they should be offered only after much rigorous examination. Until then, that’s where the word “maybe” can help you out. Whenever you hear a reactionary position, or you are about to blurt one yourself, just pause for a moment and think, “Maybe.” This allows you to truly think through the proposition, seek some evidence, wrestle with the logic. When we make such claims, we are often indulging our emotions more than our brains, and that never goes well in the world of arguments.
An excellent example recently appeared on one of my favorite television shows, CNBC’s The Profit. Marcus Lemonis was visiting a woman who ran an online flower business and had become quite successful. She was bright, hardworking, and diligent in her efforts to expand her company. However, she felt she had plateaued on her own and needed a boost from a partner with experience and cash—enter Lemonis. When he asked her why she had not been able to get extra funding when there were plenty of other venture capitalists nearby (this was in San Francisco), she replied that no one else was willing to help her because she was a woman, that she had been discriminated against .
Lemonis was surprised at this, since most investors care about money more than gender. So, he decided to look into her financials. What he discovered was she had been providing an incorrect valuation of her company when pitching to investors—quite simply, her math was way off. She also based her calculations on her location, the very wealthy Silicon Valley, which skewed her perceived value even more. She wanted one million dollars for 5% of the company—a self-determined valuation of a whopping $20 million. When Lemonis helped her get the numbers straight and eventually made her an offer to invest one million dollars for a 25% share of her company—a more reasonable $4 million valuation—she declined. She chose to ignore the expert and continue on her own. This was completely fine, obviously, as she has the right to do with her company what she wishes.
But, one has to wonder, is this what happened in her other investment meetings? Did other offers come in that she didn’t like, so she decided to lay the blame on gender discrimination rather than on her own stubbornness and lack of math skills?
Rather than going through life believing a generalized opinion, such as “Venture capitalists discriminate against women,” she instead could have thought, “Maybe that is true. But just maybe there are other reasons why no one wants to invest in my company. Maybe instead of thinking the absolute worst about people, with little evidence other than the fact that things haven’t gone the way I feel they should have gone, I should keep investigating, keep working, keep developing. Sure, maybe the world hates female business owners. Or maybe they just didn’t trust my business for reasons that had nothing to do with gender. Maybe.”
The word “maybe” allows us to slow down. It allows us to reconsider and try again. It allows us to be open-minded and available to evidence, options, and opportunities. It allows us to become smarter. “Maybe” needs to play a more prominent role in our debates.
So the next time you hear someone posit a huge declaration, simply add, “Yeah, maybe you’re right. Or maybe there are other options to consider.” And if you reach a stalemate, share a polar bear steak and agree to disagree.
This edition: the word “maybe.”
We live in world of definitive claims. Hollywood is racist. We should build a wall. College should be free. Republicans/Democrats/Muslims/Christians/Redheads are evil. Eating polar bear meat will give you powers of invisibility. We’ve heard them all before. Bold statements today grab people’s attention faster than a celebrity’s leaked cell phone photo. But far too often, these positions are as shaky as a Jenga game in a pre-school classroom.
So should we never make absolute statements? Not necessarily. But they should be offered only after much rigorous examination. Until then, that’s where the word “maybe” can help you out. Whenever you hear a reactionary position, or you are about to blurt one yourself, just pause for a moment and think, “Maybe.” This allows you to truly think through the proposition, seek some evidence, wrestle with the logic. When we make such claims, we are often indulging our emotions more than our brains, and that never goes well in the world of arguments.
An excellent example recently appeared on one of my favorite television shows, CNBC’s The Profit. Marcus Lemonis was visiting a woman who ran an online flower business and had become quite successful. She was bright, hardworking, and diligent in her efforts to expand her company. However, she felt she had plateaued on her own and needed a boost from a partner with experience and cash—enter Lemonis. When he asked her why she had not been able to get extra funding when there were plenty of other venture capitalists nearby (this was in San Francisco), she replied that no one else was willing to help her because she was a woman, that she had been discriminated against .
Lemonis was surprised at this, since most investors care about money more than gender. So, he decided to look into her financials. What he discovered was she had been providing an incorrect valuation of her company when pitching to investors—quite simply, her math was way off. She also based her calculations on her location, the very wealthy Silicon Valley, which skewed her perceived value even more. She wanted one million dollars for 5% of the company—a self-determined valuation of a whopping $20 million. When Lemonis helped her get the numbers straight and eventually made her an offer to invest one million dollars for a 25% share of her company—a more reasonable $4 million valuation—she declined. She chose to ignore the expert and continue on her own. This was completely fine, obviously, as she has the right to do with her company what she wishes.
But, one has to wonder, is this what happened in her other investment meetings? Did other offers come in that she didn’t like, so she decided to lay the blame on gender discrimination rather than on her own stubbornness and lack of math skills?
Rather than going through life believing a generalized opinion, such as “Venture capitalists discriminate against women,” she instead could have thought, “Maybe that is true. But just maybe there are other reasons why no one wants to invest in my company. Maybe instead of thinking the absolute worst about people, with little evidence other than the fact that things haven’t gone the way I feel they should have gone, I should keep investigating, keep working, keep developing. Sure, maybe the world hates female business owners. Or maybe they just didn’t trust my business for reasons that had nothing to do with gender. Maybe.”
The word “maybe” allows us to slow down. It allows us to reconsider and try again. It allows us to be open-minded and available to evidence, options, and opportunities. It allows us to become smarter. “Maybe” needs to play a more prominent role in our debates.
So the next time you hear someone posit a huge declaration, simply add, “Yeah, maybe you’re right. Or maybe there are other options to consider.” And if you reach a stalemate, share a polar bear steak and agree to disagree.